Is That Deductible? Balancing Ambition with Low Expectations

A New Phase of Life: Embracing the Non-Linear Flow

As I transition into semi-retirement, I've found myself navigating a complex and nuanced space that feels simultaneously liberating and unsettling. This new phase of life presents a unique set of circumstances that challenge long-held notions of productivity and purpose. After decades of being driven by clearly defined goals, meticulously planned tasks, and tangible accomplishments in my professional career, the shift to a more fluid and non-linear schedule has been both exhilarating and disorienting.

My current day-to-day activities now span a diverse spectrum, ranging from periodic locums work in family medicine obstetrics to dedicating time and energy towards preparing comprehensive funding applications for my innovative start-up, ChatRx. This variety in responsibilities, while intellectually stimulating, has presented its own set of psychological challenges. The absence of a rigid structure and the flexibility to allocate time as I see fit can sometimes lead to feelings of uncertainty or a lack of direction. This significant change in lifestyle, while freeing in many ways, has proven difficult to reconcile with my naturally goal-oriented nature. The ingrained habits and mindset developed over years of my professional life operating and managing a rural primary care clinic don't simply disappear overnight. The struggle to find a new balance between productivity and leisure, structure and flexibility, has become a central theme in this transitional period. It's a journey of self-discovery, requiring patience and adaptability as I learn to redefine success and fulfillment in this new chapter of life.

A Perfect Day on the River: Learning to Let Go

Recently, my wife, daughter, and I took a river float trip—a relaxed, late-summer afternoon spent drifting down a local river. It was a rare and perfect moment, filled with meaningful conversation, as it was our daughter’s last week home before she returned for her senior year of nursing school. It was a day to be cherished, especially as it came at a time when I was feeling frustrated by the delay in my Oregon locums job due to slow credentialing processes with the hospital that was preceded by the long and tedious Oregon licensing process.

The leisurely journey down the river provided an invaluable opportunity for intimate connection with your youngest daughter. As we gently floated along the waterway, the absence of a structured agenda allowed for organic, spontaneous conversations to unfold naturally. These moments of dialogue were beautifully interspersed with periods of comfortable silence, during which we could both simply absorb and appreciate the surrounding natural beauty. The unhurried pace of the river trip created a serene atmosphere, perfect for fostering a deep, one-on-one bond. This uninterrupted time together, free from the distractions of daily life, allowed for meaningful exchanges and shared observations. The tranquil environment encouraged open communication, enabling all three of us to express our thoughts and feelings that might not surface in the bustle of everyday routines. This experience exemplifies the importance of quality family time, particularly in settings that encourage mindfulness and appreciation of nature. The combination of peaceful surroundings, unstructured time, and shared activity created a perfect backdrop for strengthening familial bonds. Such moments, where parent and child can connect on a deeper level, are truly precious and contribute significantly to the fabric of our family relationships.

Business Dinner Discussions: The Philosophy of Low Expectations

That evening, my wife and I discussed the day over a business dinner—a meal that, unlike our float trip, was indeed deductible. We talked about my frustrations with the delay in my locums start date, and the professional opportunities with sports medicine and the local health department that I had been considering but ultimately decided to turn down. As we delved into these topics, my wife shared a philosophy that has guided her for years: “The First Rule of a Happy Life Is Low Expectations.”

She eloquently shared her transformative experience as a stay-at-home mom, detailing how this period in her life taught her the invaluable lesson of embracing each day with genuine contentment. This profound shift in mindset allowed her to break free from the often overwhelming burden of unmet expectations and the relentless pressure of uncompleted tasks that can plague those who have dedicated their lives to managing a home and family.

Her enlightened approach to daily living centered around finding peace and deep satisfaction in whatever circumstances or events the day presented. This perspective was rooted in the comforting knowledge that each new dawn brought fresh opportunities and possibilities. By adopting this outlook, she cultivated a sense of presence and appreciation for the moment, rather than constantly striving for an elusive future state of accomplishment. The coaching advice and loving insight she imparted proved to be an invaluable gift, offering immeasurable emotional support and a refreshing perspective. Her words resonated deeply, providing a framework for reframing one's relationship with daily life and personal expectations. This guidance served as a beacon of wisdom, illuminating a path toward greater contentment and emotional well-being for me. The impact of her shared experience extended far beyond mere advice, offering a transformative lens through which to view and appreciate the richness of everyday life together.

I cherish this aspect of our marriage, as we approach it with the mindset of a 100-100 relationship, rather than the conventional 50-50 split or a partnership where we lead separate lives. Our union represents a true fusion of our individual worlds, where we actively choose to grow together and learn from one another's experiences and perspectives. We embrace the concept of mutual submission, recognizing and valuing each other's wisdom and insights, which allows us to make decisions collaboratively and with respect for one another's viewpoints. This approach fosters a deep sense of unity and shared purpose, as we both commit fully to the relationship, giving our all rather than holding back. We understand that marriage requires continuous effort and dedication, and we willingly embrace the challenges and rewards that come with pursuing "oneness" on a daily basis. This commitment to unity extends beyond mere companionship, encompassing shared goals, values, and a joint vision for our future together. By intentionally blending our lives and prioritizing our connection, we create a strong foundation for navigating life's ups and downs as a team. This holistic view of marriage encourages open communication, empathy, and a willingness to compromise, all of which contribute to a more fulfilling and resilient partnership.

Striking a Balance: The Intersection of Business and Personal Life

As my wife,Ellen, embarks on her own entrepreneurial journey with her small business, "Scrapping in My Sleep," she's discovering the multifaceted nature of entrepreneurship. Running a successful business, regardless of its size, necessitates a well-defined structure, clear goal-setting practices, and a steadfast commitment to protecting focused work hours. These elements form the foundation of effective business management and sustainable growth. This experience is highlighting how our individual strengths complement and balance each other out in our partnership. I am inherently driven by goals and accomplishments, constantly seeking to achieve and progress. This trait can be invaluable in a business context, providing the momentum needed to push through challenges and reach new milestones. On the other hand, my wife embodies adaptability and contentment, qualities that are equally crucial in the ever-changing landscape of entrepreneurship. Her ability to pivot and find satisfaction in the journey itself can be a stabilizing force in the face of uncertainty. Together, we represent two ends of a spectrum in terms of approach and mindset. Through our ongoing discussions and shared experiences, we're coming to realize that the ideal approach to business management – and perhaps life in general – lies somewhere in the middle of this spectrum. It's about finding the right balance between ambition and flexibility, between striving for goals and appreciating the present moment. This middle ground allows for structured progress while maintaining the adaptability necessary to navigate the unpredictable nature of entrepreneurship.

Summary:

Now it’s time to decide which expense mentioned is a pre-tax business related expenditure and whih is a post tax personal cost. 

What’s Deductible and What’s Not?

• Float Trip with Our Daughter: Personal, not deductible.

• Business Dinner with My Wife: Deductible as a business expense.

• Oregon Medical License & Hospital Credentialing: Deductible as professional expenses.

• Costs for Funding Applications for ChatRx: Deductible as business expenses.

• Coaching from My Wife: Priceless, but not monetarily deductible.

Call to Action: Create Your Own Practice Without Walls

If you’re looking to strike the right balance in your own professional and personal life, and if you’re interested in setting up and operating your own micro-corporation, I invite you to sign up for my new course, Creating a Practice Without Walls. This course is designed to guide you through the process of establishing your own practice, giving you the tools and knowledge you need to succeed as both a healer and an entrepreneur. Don’t miss out—learn how to create a thriving practice that fits your life and goals today!